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I hear you ask.” Jordan Brookes (2016) “I was raised as an only child, which really annoyed my sister.” Will Marsh (2012) “I bought myself some glasses.My observational comedy improved.” Sara Pascoe (2014) “You know you’re working class when your TV is bigger than your book case.” Rob Beckett (2012) “Most of my life is spent avoiding conflict.Then I was born.” Yianni (2015) “I was playing chess with my friend and he said, ‘Let’s make this interesting’. I don’t have a licence.” Felicity Ward (2012) “I was very naive sexually.So we stopped playing chess.” Matt Kirshen (2011) 75 of Billy Connolly’s best jokes, one-liners and quips 50 of the best lines from Peep Show 50 of Tim Vine’s most ingenious jokes The 50 Best Jokes of the Edinburgh Fringe 2017 The 20 best lines from W1A “I usually meet my girlfriend at because I like that one-to-one time.” Tom Ward (2015) “I really wanted kids when I was in my early 20s but I could just never… My first boyfriend asked me to do missionary and I buggered off to Africa for six months.” Hayley Ellis (2012) “One in four frogs is a leap frog.” Chris Turner (2016) “Love is like a fart.
But my husband wouldn’t let me.” Ria Lina (2014) “One thing you’ll never hear a Hindu say…
Do you know how motivating it is swimming to the theme song from Jaws? Then she made me eat broccoli, which felt like double standards.” Sarah Millican (2011) “Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.
I mean my anxiety is through the roof but record times.” Felicity Ward (2016) “I’m single. Blue sky at night: day.” Tom Parry (2015) “It all starts innocently, mixing chocolate and Rice Krispies, but before you know it you’re adding raisins and marshmallows – it’s a rocky road.” Olaf Falafel (2016) “I was watching the London Marathon and saw one runner dressed as a chicken and another runner dressed as an egg.
It’s all right for 10 minutes, then you start to feel sick” Andrew Lawrence (2008) “Doctor, doctor! It’s a Saturday.” Dominic Frisby (2016) “Whenever I see a man with a beard, moustache and glasses, I think, ‘There’s a man who has taken every precaution to avoid people doodling on photographs of him” Carey Marx (2008) “Miley Cyrus. Which is like the manflu but worse because I also regularly have periods and I get paid less.” Sofie Hagen (2016) “Kim Kardashian tried to break the internet.
She didn’t succeed but she did leave a large visible crack.” Al Porter (2016) “I like Jesus but he loves me, so it’s awkward.” Tom Stade (2008) “My granny was recently beaten to death by my grandad.